Time for pizza

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A friend of mine keeps track of what she calls the “Unplanned Out-to-Eat Index.” I like the idea. Basically, she keeps a tally of the number of times she doesn’t have a dinner plan, or the meal doesn’t work out, or something comes up and they go out to eat.

I like that she keeps track of it, but I didn’t need anything like that. Until today.

Today was one of those days where I sat down, started working and before I knew it, it was time to catch the bus. When we met at the busstop, Rafa said that he was starving. As soon as he said that, I could feel my stomach growling too. Unfortunately, I realized I had forgotten to take the chicken out of the freezer that morning. (Yes, I realize that I can use the microwave to defrost. Nevermind that.)

“Maybe we should pick up a pizza?” I threw it out there. His eyes sparkled like a kid on Christmas morning.

So we had Papa Murphy’s. My unplanned out-to-eat index is now at one.

Usually, my trusty wipeboard helps me plan for the week so days like this don’t sneek up on me. The wipeboard has been a really important addition to our family. Everyone in our house can see the meals for the week, which helps us avoid any kitchen misunderstandings.

(Note the Thursday issue for “chicken and veggies” that didn’t happen.)

You’re those things

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Rafa and I were in the car tonight, going to church.

Rafa: “Remember (that event we went to when we first started dating)?”

Me: laughing. “I remember that! What made you think of it?”

Rafa: “I was just thinking about it…you were my co-worker, then you were my friend. Then you were my best friend. Then you became my girlfriend.

“Now you are my wife, but you are still all of those other things too.”

Knowing your spouse

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Something interesting to me lately is to think that no matter how much I know Rafa, I can never know him completely. It works the same both ways – he can never fully know me. There’s things about me he can never know. It’s not because I’m holding back. It’s just the way we humans are made.

I started thinking about this after our small group activity last week. We studies Romans 12:1-2, “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

We talked about the ways we have been transformed; we also talked about the opposite – areas of our life that we haven’t sacrificed yet. Our leader gave us two cards – one to write areas of our life that God is pleased with and one to write areas of our life that still needed to be sacrificed to God. (One of those cards was much easier to fill out than the other.)

We didn’t share what was on the cards. It was between me and God. And Rafa’s cards were between him and God. He didn’t know what was written on my cards and I didn’t know what was written on his.

Then, we went out to a fire ring and burned the card with the areas we wanted to sacrifice to God. And when they were gone, I thought about how much I know my husband, I will never know him the way his Maker does.

That’s the way it should be.

We had friends over earlier this week who just got married. It was fun to remember us in those first couple of weeks after our honeymoon, back in the pace of daily life. I know we are still newlyweds, but it feels like we’ve learned so much about each other since then. We will continue learning until the day we are done here on earth.

I voluntold him

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Rafa and I recently had a conversation with our pastor that went something like this:

Pastor: “We will be out of town during the meeting. Could one of you guys do announcements?”

Sarah: “Sure, Rafa would love to.”

There is a word for this, my friends: I voluntold Rafa.

Previously a staple of the corporate world (e.g. “My boss voluntold me to work on the project this Saturday”), I now find myself voluntelling in our marriage.

It is quite easy to slip into a habit of volunteering my husband for something I tell him to do. Yikes, that sounded…bad. And it is, which is why I have taking the pledge to not be a volunteller.  I’ll ask next time (but I will laugh every time I think of the word!).

Top 15 Albums

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I usually resist the Facebook fads, but this request sounded fun:

15 Albums The rules: Don’t take too long to think about it. Fifteen albums you’ve heard that will always stick with you. List the first fifteen you can recall in no more than fifteen minutes.

Here they are, and yes, I am aware that some of them (Jock Jams) are completely terrible. I can’t help it! They are approximately in order of the time they are/were influential in my life.

The Beach Boys – Greatest Hits
Sandi Patty – Sandi Patti and The Friendship Company
Patsy Cline – Always
Jock Jams, Volume 1
Three Doors Down – The Better Life
Joss Stone – Joss Stone
Coldplay – x&y
Jack Johnson – Brushfire Fairytales
Mat Kearney – Nothing Left to Lose
Daft Punk – Discovery
John Butler Trio – Sunrise Over the Sea
Paul Wright – Sunrise to Sunset
Jason Mraz – We sing, we dance, we steal things
David Crowder Band – Church Music
The Rock Minneapolis – Born to Die
Andrew Peterson – Counting Stars 

It was so hard to keep it to 15, so I will give honorable mentions to: John Mayer’s Continuum, Nichole Nordeman’s Brave, Fleetwood Mac’s Rumors, James Blunt’s All the Lost Souls, RENT and Les Mis soundracks, DC Talk’s Jesus Freak.

I’m amazed at how just reading the names of these artists and albums can quickly transport me back to the times they were important to me. It’s fun to think back in time to the Three Doors Down era, sliding through the mud with my friends at 93X Fest.  Or the Jock Jams years…Okay I admit – I owned volumes 1-4, but they were  for cheerleading purposes! I can’t see the words “Beach Boys” without thinking about riding in my dad’s 1932 Model T Ford, no seatbelts and windows down, on our way to a car show.

Coldplay, Jack Johnson and Mat Kearney bring back memories of darker times when I was transitioning and didn’t know the future. Jason Mraz and The Rock worship albums bring the smile back to my face when I think about riding in the car, sunroof down, with my honey.

Full Weekend? Check.

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We are just winding down from a very full, yet very fun weekend. It started on Friday, where we got to teach the Boulders (2-3 year olds) at School of Rock during church. The kids learned the Biblical truth, “God helps me,” through the fun games, activities and stories.

We didn’t have much time to sleep in on Saturday morning. We headed to Midway Stadium in St. Paul for the Kidney Walk. Gilda, Rafa and I walked for Team Target. It was so awesome to be around so many other people affected by renal disease and failure. Gilda was in good company with lots of patients, transplant recipients, health care workers and donors.

We were hungry after all that walking, so we went to our old ‘hood in South Minneapolis to visit El Nuevo Rodeo. We had a delish authentic lunch of ceveche, tacos, tostadas, enchiladas… yum.

Our friends asked us to go ValleyScare that night. It’s like regular ValleyFair, but with lots of fog machines and all orange and purple lights. We debated for about a minute before we decided to go. A 75 degree day in the middle of October? It would have been criminal not to take advantage of it.

We went on all our favorite rollercoasters and a couple of the haunted houses. I had never been in one before. Going into “The Asylum” probably wasn’t the best choice for a girl who doesn’t even watch scary movies! I had Rafa holding one hand and Laura holding another, so I was okay. I figured out if you don’t act very scared of the actors, they don’t mess with you … as much! We rode rides until the very end of the night – I can’t remember the last time we stayed out past midnight (really).

We got a ton of stuff done today. I painted the kitchen while Rafa worked on the trim throughout the upstairs. Rafa mowed the lawn/mulched some of the leaves. I got to sing for house church worship, and we spent the evening with our family there. Now – time for bed to start this week!

Blue Like Jazz

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“The most difficult lie I ever contended with is this: Life is a story about me.”

When I read that line, from Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller, I knew the book was written to me.

I read it shortly after I moved God moved me to Minneapolis. I was excited about what God was doing, but I didn’t really know where to start. I didn’t know what to think of it all.

Reading BLJ helped me find out that there were people out there like me. People who had a tough time matching up hypocrisy they saw in church with the love that Jesus talks about. People who didn’t want to go to a church building, but who actually wanted to be the church to each other and the people in their communities. When I found The Rock, I knew I found it.

When Rafa started asking me quesitons about my faith at work, I wanted to use Don’s words to explain to him that being a Christian wasn’t some stereotype of a balding Republican. Like Don, I didn’t want to talk about Christians; but I did want to talk about Jesus.

I had bought extra copies of the book to give out to people with spiritual questions. I thought that if people wouldn’t take a Bible, BLJ would be a good thing to give them because the spiritual truth is presented in a way that they wouldn’t quite know what they were getting until they read it already.

I gave Rafa one of those copies. He doesn’t like reading, but he read it from cover to cover. He probably started reading it because he had a crush on me, but no matter. Those spiritual truths made their way to him. One day, he asked me about a passage on page 142:

“I think if you like somebody you have to tell them. It might be embarrassing to say it, but you will never regret stepping up.” This was one of Rafa’s first hints to me that he liked me, and I knew that, but I didn’t think I liked him back so I kind of glossed over what he was saying. We laugh about it now.

People try to put Donald Miller into a box. They try to call him a post-modern Christian writer, or a member of the emerging church. He as said on his blog that he’s not sure where these labels come from, but he doesn’t apply them to himself. Here’s what he said in Blue Like Jazz about “the new face of church in America:”

“I don’t think any church has ever been relevant to culture, to the human struggle, unless it believed in Jesus and the power of His gospel. If the supposed new church believes in trendy music and cool Web pages, then it is not relevant to culture either. It is just another tool of Satan to get people to be passionate about nothing.”

When I found out that BLJ was going to be turned into a movie, I was excited – both to see how the book would be adapted for the movie and that the message would be carried to a more broad audience. But then, Donald Miller wrote on his blog that they didn’t have enough money and were going to walk away.

But then! Some fans set up a website: www.savebluelikejazz.com and people  (like me) started to donate money and raised $100,000 in just nine days.

God is big. If you loved the book, check out the website and make a contribution too. If you want to read the book, let me know. I will give you one of the three copies I have on hand right now.

Took a break

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It’s been almost two weeks since I have written. I haven’t taken that amount of time away from writing electronically since Rafa created our first blog almost a year ago. If anyone is still there, I’m sorry. Thanks for coming back.

I’ve still been writing, but in the little journal I keep in my personal space. I’ve been writing in the margins of my Bible and on notes tucked into the book I’m reading.

I didn’t write down most of my words for the past two weeks. They are between me and God, who cares about the things that are on my heart. “I love the Lord, for he has heard my voice,” Psalm 116 …

Be at rest once more, O my soul,
       for the LORD has been good to you.

Let it grow

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I’ve been thinking about a verse that my Bible study friends at work were discussing: James 1:3-4 “For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” (The NIV version uses the word “perseverance” instead of endurance.)

I can identify with it, because I’ve had that feeling of faith being tested lately. The verse is comforting to me, starting with the fifth word – when. “When your faith is tested…” Not if, but when.

So lately, I have been infected with the “why me” syndrome. Mind you, this is not over anything major. I have friends around me right now that are going through big, huge, very legitimate trials. Compared to the death of a father, or a year of unemployment, or many other things, my trials seem very petty. But even so, all the little things are adding up for me lately, and God used these verses to open my eyes to how I have been reacting.

How do you respond to trials? I get mad, then I figure out a way to fix it. I formulate a plan that I decide to execute (no input from God necessary, thank you very much). When that doesn’t work, I stomp my feet and entertain fantasies of throwing a tantrum. I let my attitude (soured with disappointment) shorten my fuse, affecting relationships with people around me.

Or worse, sometimes I pretend like everything is fine, like I am somehow exempt from trials. Or I use the the right phrase in Christianese (“God is in control!!!”) even when I am not really believing that God in in control. No. God has asked me to face trials knowing he is sovereign, that his plan is perfect, and that I will grow a little closer to spiritual maturity because of it.

Goodbye to summer

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Since tomorrow is the Autumnal Equinox (a.k.a. the first day of fall), Rafa and I celebrated the end of summer. We drove with the sunroof open and our shades on.

And I was happy. Not happy because summer is officially over, but so happy because I know we will have this moment again in the spring when the temperatures finally rise into the fifties and the air feels warm again.

And I know we will have this moment again next fall, and again the following spring, and again the following fall, and again and again as long as we have a car with a sunroof. Then we will start a new tradition.

There is something so comforting about the security I feel in knowing that we will share our last day of summer together for however many years God gives us on this earth together.