We had the pleasure of attending the graduation of our nieces this weekend. They are wonderful, beautiful young women who are naturally talented but have worked so hard since moving north a year and a half ago.

Rafa and I left so proud of their accomplishments and deep in thought about what it takes to raise good teenagers. This is a somewhat foreign concept to us, since we were both very bad teenagers. Famously bad. The kind bad that gives ulcers and gray hair to parents and that gives us both reason to look back with wonder on how we even survived.

When Rafa’s brother asked me questions about my prom and graduation, I tried to tell him how different it was for me. It was so cool how parents, sisters, brother, aunt and uncle could join them for the celebration. The girls are different too – they actually wanted their family there. When I graduated, I minimized the obligatory family time as much as possible so I could rush off to break the law with people I don’t even keep in contact with anymore.

The girls are smart. Book smart – yes, without a doubt. but even more important, they are smart about stuff that matters. Their sisters are their best friends and their family is their favorite group of people. I have always been pretty book smart, but pretty dumb in the “stuff that matters” department. It took me almost 10 years to figure out that being bad wastes a lot of time you could use to get to know the people who really matter in your life.